Steamers Landing: Cafe on the Hudson

Seeing that we first posted on Thursday, we had to start our adventure on Friday evening (albeit begrudgingly during the Mets game)! Just as it took us ten months to bring this idea to fruition, it took us ten months to visit the restaurant 33 floors below us in our own building. We arrived around 8:00 p.m. to see a couple with their baby asking for a table before us; they were told it would be an hour wait, so they rolled their eyes and took off down the river walk.

Well, by 8:00 p.m., even after three snacks since arriving home from work, Cait is "famished." With all her complaining, you would have expected her to be battling locals for a bag of rice on the outskirts of Mogadishu. Luckily, apparently for no other reason than that we didn't have a small child who ran the risk of annoying Steamers' patrons with screams for breast-suckling, we were told our wait would only be about 15 minutes. Caitlin's symptoms of an oncoming distended stomach could be halted! If we had wanted to sit inside, we could have been seated immediately-but we were on the water-who wants to be inside?? [And, apparently, who wants to sit a couple with a baby?!] The hostess was very pleasant -- COUGAR ALERT -- and directed us straight to the bar. She clearly became John's new best friend. Caitlin had an amaretto sour, which, as hungry as she claimed she was, might as well have been fed to her through an I.V.

Oh, and the drink prices...kind of expensive. An amaretto sour and a Kettle One and soda ran us about $19. If more people threw away money like that at Church, we'd have bought malaria nets for the entire Southern Hemisphere, not to mention Cosby-like sweaters for all the Catholic schoolchildren in India by now.

Only about five minutes later the people on the list in front of us had bolted so we were seated. John overheard the maitre d' asking the bartender if those girls in front of us had paid, to which he responded no. So the "Mooch factor" at this restaurant was much higher than anticipated. For those of you who don't know, a mooch is like a leech, but instead of latching onto your epidermis and sucking blood, they latch onto your life's experiences and manage to utilize any and all resources (food, drink, cable, air conditioning, wedding gifts) you have lying around. Basically, a mooch is a modern-day version of a bandit on the Oregon Trail. Only he won't give cholera to half your wagon.

Our table was outside. On our way in, we noticed that the outdoor table area was surrounded by about 5-foot high clear, plastic, scratched-up plexiglass separating those who like to eat and the Jillian Michaels-wannabes who infest Battery Park City. I could definitely relate to the loveable chubsters on "The Biggest Loser" as I wolfed down a steak and fries when, 10 yards away, every shirtless man with abs and sports-bra'd woman with boobs who resides in lower Manhattan ran by, in hopes that they would meet and go home with one another from some over-priced lounge later that night.

The prices for the restaurant were average for an establishment that, given its location, at least appears to be upscale. Entrees ranged from $15-$35, but the ambiance made the extra pennies definitely worth it (with the waves crashing in the background behind all the eye candy jogging by, I felt at times like I was eating on-site at one of those exercise programs they show on Fit TV around 7 a.m.). The crowd tended to be on the older side (they probably figured all the women going through menopause couldn't possibly bring crying babies in to dine), and other than two people that still looked sweaty from running, in their spandex and still wearing their IPods, people were dressed a bit nicer than Upper East Side pubs (not that there's anything wrong with that).

We started with Fried Calamari, which came with two dipping sauces-a spicy marinara and a sweet chili sauce. Delish! The breading was light, so we didn't feel like our insides had been coated with grease before our entrees arrived. I ordered the Sole en Casserole, translated to a sole baked with a crabmeat stuffing and spinach in a light cream sauce, delivered right in that hot, oval baking dish. It too, was very light. John ordered the New York Strip Sirloin Steak with shoestring fries. Yes, boring...but I didn't want to be too adventerous for our first posting. Cait's was cheaper and much better. John ordered his steak medium. The first few bites were medium, but the rest was overly well done. The fries were thin, which Cait preferred. She apparently feels the need to point this out despite the fact that the menu specified the potatoes were of the "shoestring" variety. John had a few bites of mine and I think he wished he ordered that, too. As I too am writing on this blog, I concur. I guess at a place called Steamers Landing you should go with the fish! The dessert options looked tempting, at least on paper, but Caitlin made the call, and John got no cake.

The service was fine...nothing noteworthy. I don't even recall if the same person came over to our table more than twice. One thing that annoyed me: The waiter pulled out a guilt-trip face when he came over to our table to see if we wanted drinks and he just then "noticed" that we'd already paid for them at the bar while we waited for our table. He easily saw the two drinks on our table before he walked over, and certainly saw them before he started to ask us for our drink order. To seem nice, and to give him a glimmer of hope that our bill would increase beyond just two entrees and an appetizer, I told him we'd hang onto the wine menu. Because of his little look of "shock" that we had gotten drinks at the bar 5 minutes before, I didn't want to order any wine, just for spite. We were each trying to get the upper hand on the other, and I was sure the Kettle One and tonic was big enough to lead me to victory over this guy. But thirst conquers all...And although the waiter won, there's something bittersweet in the fact that he had to serve me the glass of wine.

Our food came out hot and quickly, which are both strong in Cait's eating world. Too easy, BUT I promised Cait that, at first, I'd keep the jokes family-friendly.

The restaurant is certainly worth a visit for the view and a chance to sit outside in the beautiful summer air. But order the fish!